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Stanley Bing, a novelist and columnist for Fortune magazine, recently published an enlightening – let alone hilarious – piece on his blog. Titled “When Smart People Use Bad Grammar,” the article describes the common confusion around the usage of the personal pronouns “I” and “me.”
I’m sitting at a lounge last week in Los Angeles with a top business reporter. True, we’re drinking, but that doesn’t really explain what happens next. I’m conversing with him about something that doesn’t really concern you, and things get kind of confidential, and I ask for his promise that the matter will remain off the record. ”Don’t worry,” says the reporter, a graduate of a fine college and probably a reputable journalism school. “That will just be between you and I.”
And here is his explanation on the proper usage:
For the record, and for those who even marginally care: this is really easy. The word “I” is used when the You in questions is the subject of a sentence. “I” does things. “I like that,” you say. You don’t say, “Me like that,” unless you are Tarzan. “Me” makes his appearance when things are done to You. “He really screwed me on that deal,” is both a common occurrence and correct usage.
If you want to read more about this topic, we covered the issue on the article “Me, Myself, and I.”
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The explanation really doesn’t explain this particular use, in “… between you and I”, because “I” is neither the subject nor the object in this sentence. The subject is “That” (as it’s the thing that “will be”) and I don’t think there is an object.
So, what to do in the case when “I”/”me” is neither subject nor object? Is it always “I” then?
I have always used the simple test that if you would replace the “you and I/me” expression with “we”, then it is “you and I”. Alternatively, if you would replace it with “us” than it is “you and me”.
Thomas, it depends on the context. In “between you and me” you know that between is a preposition, and pronouns after prepositions go in the accusative form, that is why you need to use “me” and not “I.”
The rules for using the pronoun “I” versus the pronoun “me,” are as follows: The pronoun “I” is used in the subjective case; that is, “I” is always used in three ways: 1) as the subject of the sentence, 2) after a linking verb, or 3) after the words “than” or “as” when used in comparison. The word “me” is used in the objective case; that is, it is used: 1) as the object of the prepostion, 2) the object of the verb, or 3) after “than” or “as” when not used in comparisons.
Examples:
Subjective Case
1) I am going to the store.
2) It was I at the door.
3) He makes more money than I.
Objective Case
1) The discussion will stay between you and me.
2) Throw me the ball.
3) The law applies to you as well as me.
In response to Thomas’s inquiry, the subject in the word group “That will just be between you and I,” is not “That.” There is no subject in this word group. It is implied rather than stated. FYI, the word “that” is never the subject. The problem is that we tend to write like we speak, and we speak incorrectly (technically) all the time, but we need to be more fastidious when writing.
I hope this helps.